Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize