you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
