i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
