i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I have post one night stand depression
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize