Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
