I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
