Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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