Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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