Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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