It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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