im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
