Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I need moral support for this bender
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
