a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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