HIV tests are more positive than that guy
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
