I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
