maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
