yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
