wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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