Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
