The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
