i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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