Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
