i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
