Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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