what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Dick very happy bro
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
