if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
