Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
