Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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