fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
