Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
