So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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