If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
