i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
