I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
