Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
