Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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