Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
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