All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
