she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
