Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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