i may or may not be watching the land before time
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
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you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
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Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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