I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
