yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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