I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We got so high we made milksteak
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize