I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
If I die, sorry about rent.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize