Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
