Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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