2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
