You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
