dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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